changes / changing

My friends are lame. No, I’m lame for not doing the things I want to do. I don’t NEED them to go out with me. I’ve gone out alone and have been fine, but it is more fun when you go with people you know you’re going to have a good time with. Too bad my friends never want to go out with me. No again, Bunny has been very awesome about coming out with me. I guess I just want more. Leslie never goes out anymore, well with me that is. Oh well. I thought she would have maybe wanted to go out with me last night to Dark Sparkle cause that used to be our thing and it was at the Café Du Nord which we both like.

She sounded kind of funny on the phone when Bunny, Parker and I went out for Meredith’s birthday. I told her to join us but she said, “No, no.. I wasn’t invited.” Even though I told her I was inviting her ass she still didn’t want to come like she was a tag along or something, I don’t know. The tone in her voice made me feel weird like I, we were excluding her. But we weren’t. I didn’t know what time Leslie was going to be home from work. We left around 8:30 to meet up with Meredith at this amazing hotel. It was quite exquisite, breath taking even. And I guess I just figured she wouldn’t want to come because lately she hasn’t been wanting to go out. I don’t understand and I wish I could crawl inside her head and re-wire her sometimes. I love Leslie. I miss my Leslie time. It used to be just me and her going out and now-